Jun 24, 2008

Alternate Routes are OK

My father-in-law called early this morning after he woke from a nightmare about Bill. In the dream Bill was drowning and calling out for help.

To interject: Today was the day that Bill was going to go in and talk to his instructors about his missing class all of last week (back injury again) and not being able to catch up on assignments (learning disorder and Asperger's Syndrome). Bill was sure the instructors would counsel him to drop out because this is a very complicated and fast paced computer programming course.

Both of us had a hard time sleeping last night. I've seen this before. This is Bill's cycle.

Thankfully, his Dad came right over (he lives a mile away) with my Mother-in-law and they brought over breakfast and encouragement. My Mom-in-law brought flowers and went right to work planting them in the flower beds. I think it is her way of showing her love and support. It's hard to know what to do and how to help.

It was time to go. Bill asked me to come along. We went together to the college, once again. One entrance was blocked due to construction. We took an alternate route.

Thankfully, the professors were very understanding and willing to provide accomodations. After some discussion, we collectively decided that Bill should only take half the classes offered each semester, even though it will take him twice as long to finish.

With some relief, Bill went to withdraw from one of the classes even though the time had officially expired. They tried anyway-- and it went through! This may seem like a coincidence, but I know it is one of the Lord's tender mercies we get from time to time.

Turns out alternate routes are ok.

Jun 21, 2008

Up, Up and Away

Mercedes was able to go up in an airplane for free--something I did not know about. The program is called Young Eagles, endorsed by Harrison Ford, who is a member. So check it out! The program introduces your child to flying and afterwards they get a nice certificate... Anyway, here is the address: http://www.youngeagles.org/ It makes a fun birthday present and cheap, too!

Jun 13, 2008

Some Days Are Like That

This was written on a bad day:

I never really had any huge plans when it came to having a family, except for the part where I wanted ten kids. So, when my fiancé and I discussed having children, he explained how he had always wanted to have ten children and lucky me--I found my male doppelganger.

Having grown up a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons), we believe that families can be together forever. After we were married, we didn’t waste any time and 11 months later a baby girl was born. We didn’t know it, but later Mercedes would become the older sister of three autistic brothers.

Now here it is almost 14 years later and we are in the midst of this autism whirlwind. My fairy tale dreams have included four children, plus a “big child husband” (diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome at age 35). I am tired. My house is a mess. My world is isolating and confining. I live each day hour by hour, sometimes minute by minute. I cannot think about the future, for that will undo me. We only have four children, but it sure feels like ten on some days.
I ask myself a lot of questions but I don’t have the answers. No one around me has any answers. So, I turn to prayer as a comfort, a guide. In the meantime, I force myself to do the day to day tedious and unrelenting tasks hoping that I’m getting somewhere and that there is a point to all of this.

Some days are just like that.

The other day Ryder had his first-ever regular poo. I took a picture, (don’t worry, I won’t post it) and did a dance of joy.

Dealing with autism sure makes you get excited about the little things that most people take for granted. Who cares about a trip to Disneyland when your four year old had his first-ever well formed, non-smelly poo in his diaper? See? This is what I’m dealing with on a day to day basis. This makes for a very difficult time to relate to others. It’s lonely down here on the bottom. Literally.

Jun 10, 2008


(Disclaimer: No little boys were harmed in the making of this blog.)

Speaking of laundry, Ryder loves to have the warm clothes dumped on top of him when he's on my bed. He snuggles up to underwear and socks alike, then takes a nap.

Jun 7, 2008


We finally got Ryder's test results back. Besides having four metal objects of unknown origin in his gut, he also has some MAJOR yeast and bacteria overgrowth. No wonder he is always bloated and gassy and in pain. His belly looks like those poor kids in Africa who are suffering from malnutrition. (Normally I'd say Ethiopian, but I'm trying to be politically correct here so I don't offend anyone). The dr has started him on Flagyl and Diflucan.

I asked the dr why the pediatricians don't listen to the mothers when they are the ones that do all of the research and know their kid's tummies. He said, "I get that all of the time from parents". I think that doctors everywhere need to be schooled and updated in Autism research and protocol. At least they need to humor the parents and pretend they are listening instead of saying, "Don't expect Ryder to be as bright as other children". I thought the hypocratic oath was "...first do no harm...." What about harming from a psychological viewpoint? To tell a child/parent that their kid is not bright is mean. What a Meanie.

Sometimes I feel like a Mama Bear. I only wish I could hybernate and live off stored body fat.

Jun 5, 2008


Click on the link below to view the Green Our Vaccines rally in Washington D.C.:

How would it be to have a boyfriend like Jim Carrey? You'd have to wear Depends all of the time. :D



Ernie and Oscar learn they like different things-great for kids on the Spectrum!